Take the Time to Think

Immediate reactions to stressful situations are part of our fight or flight response, but rarely do we find ourselves in a life-or-death situation that requires such a reaction. In our daily lives and in the usual social settings, taking at least a few seconds to exhale, take in the situation, and get our logical brain working leads to the best solution. Sometimes that’s easier said than done.

Politicians, salespeople and others who want to influence us are masterful at using words and actions to trigger our emotions, with the goal of getting us on board with them even if it is against our best interests. If they can get us to react without thinking the situation through, they can succeed, no matter how whacked-out their position is when examined with an objective mind. We’re seeing this now to great effect on the far right and far left with messaging that is so outlandish one would think that no rational human would agree. However, once hooked by the intended knee-jerk reaction, cognitive dissonance makes it difficult to admit to ourselves that we may not be seeing the real issue. Either that or too many people just want to be told what to think as it’s too hard for them to think for themselves. I’d like to believe the former is more prevalent, but I fear it’s the latter, and that is just plain scary.

There are also situations that we make harder on ourselves by reacting without taking a step back to think things through. I recently had a couple of none-emergency situations in which I did not do that. No bad consequences but I could have saved myself a bit of work had I taken my own advice.

The first one happened on the way back from dinner a few weeks ago when my vehicle gave me a low oil alarm. It actually put on the screen “Oil is at minimum level. Add a quart as soon as possible.” Impressive in its detail, huh? I knew the issue was that the oil pan gasket that had been on watch for almost 2 years had finally deteriorated to the point of leaking a quart of oil - over a 5 month period. Not a serious threat, but time to get to the nearby dealer for repairs. Had I exhaled and checked the oil level the next morning before just adding a quart of oil I likely would have found that the vehicle was still OK to drive the short distance to the dealer without it. No big deal, but it would have saved me a trip to the auto parts store on my bike to get the oil.

The second incident occurred when I noticed the mesh on one of the gutter guards over our front door was missing. As it was early spring and the nearby trees would be dropping buds, etc. into my gutters I rushed to replace that piece. No small task due to the way it was installed. I just jammed the new piece in place and got off the ladder as quickly as I could. While on the ladder however, I noticed that the birds that frequent our bird feeder realized after 5 years that the mesh strands on our gutter guards make great nest material. I guess they are not hip to the organic movement. Later that day as I was doing something else, my brain clicked back on the gutter issue and I figured out an easy way to properly fit that piece into place. Having learned my lesson, before I replace all the pieces I’ll see how things go as the little helicopters fall off the tree next door and the leaves come in. If no clogs, no changes. That would just be more work for me and more nesting material for the #*@&^%! birds. (Update – 3 big storms and no clogs evident!)

There are some exceptions though, such as in sports where actions need to be automatic and thinking about what you’re doing, particularly if you are not playing well, can negatively impact performance. When that happens, it’s called “getting inside your head”. This happened to me a few softball seasons ago when I was in a severe batting slump. One of my teammates told me, “Don’t think, just hit”. That helped me to relax and to get out of my own head, and sure enough when I stopped trying to think about where to hit the ball and just focused on hitting it, my slump ended. Whenever I’m in a situation in which I am over-thinking things, I remember that advice and it helps.

Other than the few exceptions, when we react without taking a deep breath and calming ourselves, we often make less than ideal decisions. Those who want to influence us count on that to gain support for their positions. Whether it’s a fast-talking politician, slick salesperson, breathless newsperson, or thieving birds that push your buttons, take a step back to let your rational brain engage. You’ll see through the smoke and mirrors, better analyze the message or situation, and make a much better decision on how to respond.

www.RetiredandInspiredat55.com 6-20-2022